Happiness Comes From Within?

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When one thinks of happiness what comes to mind? The next vacation, your dream home, a salary raise, the weekend, debt freedom, retirement? To some these external ideals are but an idea of what happiness is. But how many people have achieved their dreams only to find themselves still unhappy, still searching for that next rush that will bring them happiness. Is it lasting? Let’s seek to find how happiness comes from within.

When we think about our families and our children we want their happiness. When they are young we derive a sense of pleasure from their achievements; a soccer trophy, a good report card. Does it make us happy when we achieve our fitness goals? When we get to that perfect weight and can fit in to that outfit…will there be happiness then? Are these external factors for happiness or does happiness come from within?

One day you find yourself stuck in traffic, late for an engagement, feeling that all too familiar feeling rising up from your gut. You feel a tightening in your chest and all of a sudden you start to lay on your horn, angry and frustrated at all these things around you that are out of your control. Then by the time you get home the evening goes from bad to worse.

Is there a solution for this constant search for personal happiness? How could things have played out differently? Are you looking for happiness in all the wrong places? Can any one thing make you happy? What if the things around you never changed, but your response to them did? All the more reason to think that perhaps happiness comes from within.

Imagine for a minute that all of these “things” were no longer there. Where would your personal happiness come from now? Perhaps you could try this 21 day experiment…a fast of sorts. It takes 21 days to change a habit after all. Create for yourself a simple life. Take the time to look around you in thanksgiving. During this 21 days keep a journal and write down all of the things that you are thankful for every day. It might be that you woke up this morning. It might be your first cup of coffee, or that your car started. It might be that you woke to the gentle falling of rain against your window.

Next, start to listen to the proclamations that come out of your mouth. Then, ponder the statement “out of the heart the mouth speaks.” That is a true statement. It reflects what is being discussed here that happiness comes from within. If you watch what comes out of your mouth you will get a true indicator of what is going on within you; in your heart. Have you also heard of the term “believe till you will receive?” Well, try this…try speaking the things that you imagine for yourself. Make a choice for happiness. For example, as you hear the words come out of your mouth “I am sick and tired of always being ________”. This is a real core belief statement that just leaked out, most of the time unnoticed. Try instead saying “I am so thankful that I always receive_______”.

This is not an easy venture, but by the end of the 21 days you will discover some real core beliefs that you hold and then you have a decision to make. Will you choose to be happy? Will you become conscious of the thoughts and words that you speak? Will you choose to change your thinking? The question was “Does happiness come from within?” It is very evident that happiness does come from within; from the decision to create your own personal happiness and turn your life around. Perhaps it is the sense of inner peace and contentment. The choice is yours.

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Source by Nicole Roberts

Real Estate And The Degree Of Happiness

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Having practically doubled in value during the past six years and going, real estate is over half way towards notching up its best decade ever. Market capitalism, the engine that moves real estate, seems to be doing its job well. But is it? Once upon a time that job was generally agreed to be to make people better off. Nowadays, this is not so clear. A number of real estate consumers backed, somehow, by an increasing number of analysts think that real estate ought to be doing something else: making people happy.

The view that real estate should be about more than just money has been widely held in Europe for decades. And now the idea of “wellness” behind real capital assets has sprouted in North America too, catering especially to the prosperous baby-boomers. Much of this draws on the upstart science of happiness, which mixes psychology with economics. Its adherents cite copious survey data, which typically shows some unsurprising results: the rich report being happier than the poor. However, a paradox emerges that requires an explanation: affluent countries, taken as a whole, have not gotten much happier as real estate has appreciated and as people have grown richer.

The science of happiness offers two explanations for the paradox. Capitalism, it notes, is adept at turning luxuries into necessities, thus bringing to the masses what the elites have always enjoyed. But the flip side is that people come to take for granted things they once coveted from afar. Homes they never thought they could possess become essentials they cannot do without. In a way, consumers are stuck on a treadmill: as they achieve a higher standard of living, they become inured to its pleasures.

Add to all this the fact that many of the things people most prize – such as an exclusive home address – are luxuries by necessity. An exclusive mansion, for instance, ceases to be so if it is provided to everyone. These “positional goods”, as they are called (a reference to the hierarchical ‘position’ within society), are in fixed supply: you can enjoy them only if others do not. The amount of money and effort required to grab them depends on how much your rivals are putting in.

All this somehow casts a doubt on the long-held dogmas of Economics. The science of Economics, especially as it applies to Capitalism, assumes that people know their own interests and are best left to mind their own business. How much they work and what they buy is their own affair. But the new science of happiness is much less willing to defer to people’s choices. In 1930 John Maynard Keynes imagined that richer societies would become more leisured, where people would have more time to enjoy the finer things in life. Yet most people still work hard to afford things they think will make them happy. They also aspire to a higher place in society and purchase status goods such as expensive homes, and in so doing they work even harder and have less leisurely time at their disposal.

On the other hand, if economic growth through consumerism does not make people happy, stagnation will hardly do the trick. Ossified societies guard positional goods even more jealously. A flourishing economy creates opportunity, which in turn spurs happiness to a certain degree. It is hard to say that most people were unhappy during the heydays of the real estate boom.

To find the real estate market or, for that matter, the entire capitalistic system at fault because they do not deliver joy as well as growth is to place too heavy a burden on them. For many to do well is not enough: they want to do better than their peers, and this competition sets anxiety very deep.

Real estate can make people well off and the consequence of it is that one can choose to be as unhappy as he wishes. To ask anymore of it would be asking too much.

Luigi Frascati

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Source by Luigi Frascati

What Makes People Happy? – Get Involved With Shameless Happiness

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What makes people happy? Shameless happiness comes from sacrificing your own wishes to please others – not always, but from time to time. Occasionally doing what’s best for others will help to make you happy; it’s another key to shameless happiness.

Pleasing yourself can make you happy. But only up to a point. If you only please yourself, you’ll help to create a dog-eat-dog world that the philosopher, Thomas Hobbes, described as “solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” According to Albert Ellis, creator of rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT), it’s much easier to be happy if you live in a social group or community and help that group to thrive. The alternative is to sit back and whine about conditions rather than rolling up your sleeves and doing what you can to improve them.

You’ll be much happier if you develop your social skills and learn to get along with others especially if you become particularly close and intimate with a few of them. Most of the time you’ll want to do what’s best for you, but you’ll get great enjoyment if, from time to time, you sacrifice your wishes to please others. If you are fair to others, and considerate of their wishes, you’ll find that they often do likewise to you; in this way you can add to your own happiness. By cooperating synergistically with others you can work together to help one another achieve your goals and find shameless happiness.

If you act unethically, trample over the rights of others, and ignore social problems, it’s unlikely that you’ll create the kind of world in which you can live comfortably and happily. Shameless happiness comes to those who get involved in a constructive way with those around them. That’s what makes people happy.

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Source by Will Ross

3 Reasons Why Happiness is Elusive

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We talk about happiness every day of our lives in our elusive search for it. We see happiness as something external we can just pluck out of nowhere when we want it, just call it up when we want to have a better day. Moreover, happiness seems to affect everyone else except us. If you are looking to the outside world or to material things for happiness you are looking in the wrong place. Real happiness cannot be found in outside of us. Often we are denied happiness because we don’t know how to begin the search.

Happiness has given us humans a lot of trouble for three main reasons. First, we don’t know how to define happiness to suit ourselves. Everyone defines happiness in a different way. Quite simply, many people don’t know what they want to make them happy so their choices change literally according to their moods. They believe happiness is something they work towards not realising, or accepting, that happiness starts inside of us first. It is not an ideal destination we spend our life heading for. It actually is with us every day, from this minute, and demonstrates itself in how we love and appreciate ourself. How can we ever find happiness if we don’t know what it means for us?

How can we be truly happy if we are not clear about what makes us happy or we expect others to fulfil that need? Defining what would make you happy, whether your purpose in life, your desires or visions, is the very first step to being truly happy. It means when those things appear you will recognise them instead of living in ignorance of who you are and what makes you tick.

Second, we are always looking for happiness with someone else or with material things. We often believe that getting a new dress, a new car, new flat, new yacht will do the trick: to bring us that elusive happiness we have sought. But any material things give us moments of temporary JOY. They do not give long term happiness. Material things help us to enjoy various aspects of life that money can buy but they bring no happiness where we live without self love, without esteem, without love for others and without care and compassion. We can have everything in the world at our fingertips, but if we lack self-love and contentment, especially when we feel like crap, we will remain unhappy.

Address the Real Issues

Cue stars like Britney Spears, Robbie Williams, both in rehab, and Whitney Houston with the perennial problems with Bobby Brown. They might be very rich people but has their money helped in their search for self-appreciation and love? If we are unhappy with our nose, no amount of fiddling with our hands will sort the problem with that nose until we address the real issue. Many celebrities believe that fame and fortune will make them happy, but then reach their desired rainbow only to find that they left their pot of gold way behind them. Happiness starts from within, when we are truly happy with who we are and seek no approval. When we can accept our warts and failings and realise that nothing detracts from the magnificent and amazing beings we are.

Finally, happiness eludes us because we think we do not deserve it.

I met a guy once whom I really liked but we never got off the ground because he kept saying how he didn’t deserve me or such a wonderful relationship. He was dwelling on the fears in his head instead of giving thanks for us finding each other. Naturally, his fears became a self-fulfilling prophecy because his negative thoughts began to sabotage possible meetings. As he felt he didn’t deserve me, he immediately put mental barriers to enjoying my company. Somehow, there was always a crisis whenever we set dates. He then felt terrible about it, which increased his feelings of inadequacy and reinforced his thoughts of being undeserving even more, in an unending vicious circle. We cannot have the opposite of what we are thinking. We have to think as we mean it to happen to get the results we are after.

So begin the process of defining happiness as it means to YOU. What would really make you happy for the next few years? NOT forever, because we evolve as people and our needs inevitably change with time, and not just for a moment either. Then look inside of you to see how you feel about yourself and how that happiness will sit with your general contentment and esteem. Then believe you deserve it because we all deserve happiness. Some people are not just sent here to suffer and some to be happy. We all face the same possibilities. Our outcomes depend on the choices we personally make which then decide the direction we ultimately travel: whether towards finding that elusive happiness or moving even further away from it.

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Source by Elaine Sihera

The Key of Happiness (Poetic Prose)

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Have you ever felt so happy, that you thought the world was perfect and that nothing could ever dim your joy? Have you ever felt so alone, that may be a shy and tremulous tear appeared in the window of your soul? Have you ever wonder why? Why cannot we those feelings control? They attack us by surprise, overwhelming our world, submerging us in a sea of confusion and endless gloom. We all dream about a life without pain, sadness or stress; most people think that it is a utopia taken from a fiction movie or from a poet’s mind.

The key of happiness is real, are you ready to pay the price, to unveil the mystery, to track the treasure, kick the stones and make your way out to the light?…follow me, it is not so far… will tell you what all is about; step by step I hope to guide you to a more pleasant life; just read and meditate about these golden rules I am pointing you out: Please get out of the shell, and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop longing for what you do not have. Forget about the past, either good or bad. Stop thinking about the days yet to come; stay right here right now. Do not lock up yourself at home, watching the hours running away from the clock. Stand up and live, this time it is worthy to strive to the most. Start enjoying the things that are in your hands. May be the precious happiness you still cannot find, but for sure you will… live an easier life.

Take my hand let’s think together, dream like a child do not be shy…I have a bicycle I do not have a car, I will go for a ride in the park. I have no money, but I do have someone who can lend me a few bucks. May be I have no beauty, but I do have a bright mind. I have no family, but I do have many kind friends, who can give me a good advice. May be you are lacking of many things…even health, but you do have a life. You always have something, just watch the positive side. Suddenly some keywords came across my mind: faith, patience, wisdom, deep-thinking, self-confidence and never give up. You don’t need to be beautiful, rich or a genius; you don’t even need much health, friends, family or even love, to be happy. Happiness is inside of you and you can feel it anytime. The key of happiness is in your heart, and it’s not a fairy tale, or magic or a piece of fine art. You can get it easily, no need to be very smart.

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Source by Patricia Schiavone

Happiness: A Matter of Choice

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The pursuit of happiness is a matter of choice. It doesn’t really matter what type of circumstances we have in our life. We still have a choice to live an unhappy life or we can choose to live a happy life.

Our level of happiness has nothing to do with the things that other people say or do. Happiness is not something that we gain from the affirmation of others; rather it comes from within. It has something to with our mindset. No matter how critical our situation is, we can still be happy.

Happiness is also an attitude of mind. We can start to be happy at any time we want. All we need to do is to make a decision. Once we decide to be a happy person, then we need to do whatever it takes to be happy because happiness is a journey.

If we choose to live a happy life, no matter what life can present to us, we have to stick to it. Once we have understood and accepted that happiness comes from within, it is not impossible to be happy even during the toughest of times of life because we already know how we should hold on to those good times by seeing the world in a different light.

Happiness relates to how we feel. We are emotional human beings. We experience a wide range of feelings on a daily basis. We feel fear and anger. We also feel positive emotions such as enjoyment and hope to help us build our capacity to cope when things go wrong.

Trying to live a happy life is not about denying negative emotions or pretending to feel joyful all the time. We have to embrace the fact that we all encounter adversity and it’s completely natural for us to feel anger, sadness, frustration and other negative emotions as a result.

Happiness is not just about being able to cope the most of the good times but also to cope effectively with the inevitable bad times. Happiness is in fact a key to success because happy people are also less likely to engage in risky behavior. Happy people are even more financially responsible because they save more and have more control over their expenditures.

Happy people still get sick and lose loved ones. As a matter of fact, not all happy people are efficient, creative or generous. Happy people are less anxious, less depressed and less stressed. They are more optimistic and confident. They have a deeper sense of well-being, have more passion and zest for life, have a stronger sense of meaning and purpose and see the world as essentially a friendly place filled with good people and plenty of opportunity.

Happy people simply love and enjoy life much more than their sadder counterparts.

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Source by Rosemarie Sumalinog Gonzales

Happiness – How to Avoid Suffering

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How can you be happy every day and feel wonderful because you wake up to live another day? This is a dream quite far from most people’s daily reality…

When you wake up, you want to destroy your alarm clock and several problems that are waiting for your solution start appearing in your mind, one after the other.

Happiness is not part of your routine… It appears to be something you will find, but never becomes true. It is more an illusion than a purpose.

A long time ago, things were this way for me as well. Everything seemed lost and empty. Everything was covered with the dust of time, without a future or hope.

However, I started studying dream interpretation and many other scientific subjects that opened my mind.

I understood the reason for my depression, my mistakes and how to solve all my problems and feel happy.

If you have many problems, you are very far from happiness…

To your surprise, you will see that you are responsible for your own suffering! Everything negative that happens to you reflects your psychological world and is a consequence of your mistakes.

By interpreting your dreams, you will learn how to correct your mistakes and see and evaluate other aspects of reality that you are not observing now.

This way you don’t live in the darkness of ignorance but you see everything clearly, and you can develop your personality and build a better world with your work and example.

Happiness becomes an obvious result of your wisdom and your life changes completely, just as your personality becomes stronger and more unique.

By interpreting your dreams, you can go back to the past and analyze everything that happened then and how it affected your life and psyche. Your wrong impressions and decisions clearly appear in the dream messages. This way you can understand why certain situations resulted in negative outcomes, why you took the wrong road and how you can recuperate the time you lost doing what was not good for you.

You don’t suffer in ignorance of what happened to you and without knowing the solution to your suffering. You discover how to overcome all your problems, continuing your life in the wisest way and succeeding everywhere.

You can also see the future and how everything will be then, so that you may prepare the future you desire, changing what doesn’t seem to be good for what will surely make you happy.

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Source by Christina Sponias

Lessons From Forrest Gump – Success and Happiness

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To me, the overriding purpose of this film is to influence viewers’ attitudes and behavior. The film shows audiences that people should not judge a book by its cover. For instance, although Forrest Gump was perceived to be an individual with very low intellectual capabilities, that did not stop him from being an excellent friend to those that knew, and understood him. A good example of this could be seen with his friendship with Bubba, a man that he met while enlisting in the Vietnam War. While most people harassed Forrest Gump because of his low IQ levels, Bubba treated him with the respect and trust that he deserves, regardless of Gump’s intellectual downfalls. This mutual trust and respect led Bubba to convincing Forrest to go into the shrimp business with him after the war was over. Unfortunately, the war ended up killing Bubba, but that did not stop Forrest Gump from fulfilling his promise to Bubba, thus the beginning of Bubba Gump’s shrimp business. With this in mind, people should treat others ethically, morally, and with the respect that they deserve, regardless of their perceived downfalls. As was evident with this film, even people of the lowest caliber, could end up achieving some of the most amazing feats that would astonish even the most hypocritical person. Therefore, people must learn not to be judgmental towards others, and to value diversity because everyone has a gift to offer to the world. In their own special way, these individuals could end up making a positive impact to those around them, such as the case with Forrest Gump.

The surface level subject of this film is to show audiences the adventures of a charmed simpleton with lower than average IQ, named Forrest Gump, who defies all odds by achieving some of the most amazing feats during a time of crisis in American history. For instance, while Forrest Gump had the intellectual capabilities that were mentally challenged, he was able to become a national ping-pong and football champion; served with honors in the Vietnam War; taught Elvis Presley how to dance; invested successfully in Apple Computers; and he even got Jenny, the girl of his dreams and they had a baby together. The deeper underlying subject, or theme, of the film was to show audiences that anything is possible if you believe in yourself, and work hard at achieving those goals. The film highlights that anyone, can achieve the American Dream since we live in the land of opportunity. All that is required is having hope, and believing in the endless possibilities of the human spirit. That no matter how grim things may seem, it is still possible to achieve those goals. In addition, the film also highlights the importance of relationships, valuing diversity, and how supportive relationships could assist in making a positive impact not only on a person’s life, but in society as well.

Given how the film ended, I consider the moral of the story about cherishing the moments that you have with your loved ones because life is short. That success and happiness is acquired through the process of accepting and experiencing the challenges in life, and with a little bit of luck, you can become the person that you’re destined to be. Everyone knows that life is short. Sometimes people do take others for granted, and by not appreciating the relationships that you currently have with others, there might be a time in the near future where it might be too late to let them know how you really feel. Although Forrest Gump always highlighted his love for Jenny, Jenny didn’t reciprocate the same level of love for Forrest until it was too late. Due to this, Forrest and Jenny were unable to spend too time together as a married couple before she passed away. In addition, I also believe that happiness is a state of mind. In order to truly be happy, people must accept who they are and work towards improving themselves by facing the challenges that are presented to them in life. Although luck does play a minor role in achieving success, people must position themselves through actions, to be there at the moment opportunities present themselves. Through these traits, people would be one step closer to the person that they are destined to be, thus achieving success and happiness in parallel.

So if you haven’t had a chance to watch this movie, I would recommend watching it when possible. Even if you’ve watched the movie, I would still recommend watching it again because people could learn a lot about success and happiness from Forrest Gump. Let me know your thoughts on the movie after you’ve watched it as I’m curious if you’ve seen the same hidden messages as I did. Personally, I enjoyed the movie more the second time around!

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Source by Bryan Chau

Shmirshky: The Pursuit of Hormone Happiness

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The very first thing I wanted to know when I opened this book is what is Shmirshky. Well, it is Dolgen’s nickname for a woman’s privates. We all have nicknames but Shmirshky is not just a name but a symbol or representation of all women who are experiencing menopause. Everything you would ever want to know about menopause is in this book. It was very thought provoking and educational for me to read this. I didn’t know what was happening to me and Dolgen covers every aspect of the symptoms, how to deal with them and how to get the right medication for treatment. She gives advice on how to find the right doctor to help you get through PM&M, her fond term for menopause.

Women have to understand they are not alone. Dolgen shares experiences of her own as well as many other women she has interviewed and asked very delicate questions. She brings about a sisterhood by informing the reader of what changes to expect and how to get your family involved and becoming supportive. After all, they will be going through this with you. The reader will be able to ask for help and talk with family members about PM&M. Husbands and children will benefit from reading Shmirshky as well. No longer do women have to hide in shame. This book shines a light on the many changes a woman can go through experiencing PM&M.

Dolgen has introduced a whole new vocabulary of acronyms for the women, men and family members. In the back of the book she offers definitions of medical terms as well as all of the acronyms she uses through out the book. Readers will find a hormone therapy menu, hormone brands, website resources, a daily symptom chart and a journal. Everything a woman needs to get through this process that none of us will be able to escape. Don’t think that if you have a hysterectomy that you will be set free. Dolgen has a section on that as well. She stresses not to run towards surgery because it’s dangerous and you still end up going through menopause. She even speaks with women who share experiences with what happened to them after surgery.

Shmirshky is an important book for every woman. I highly recommend this fun and enlightening book for families too. It’s a quick read and you will laugh, cry and totally relate to these women and their stories. Thanks Ellen, for sharing so much wonderful information.

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Source by Kristi Bernard

How to Find Happiness and True Love in a Relationship

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Can you find happiness and true love in a relationship? Are you looking for a partner to make you happy or complete you? Is your relationship less than satisfactory and you are wondering how to improve it? Often we find it impossible to meet our dream guy or find happiness with a man simply because we are looking in the wrong place.

When we look for love, we proceed to look for someone whom we find loveable. Then we try to train him to be the person that we want him to be – a person whom we can continue to love. How do we do this? Usually, by creating a scene and letting him know how upset we are when he doesn’t behave as we wish. By this he learns that when he exhibits this behaviour we won’t be pleased and we are certainly going to let him know it in the future. If he’s the type of guy that wants to make us happy, then he stops doing it. Or perhaps he just goes underground and does it in secret next time. Either way, he is probably going to feel some resentment towards us.

When our guy is loveable i.e. he is doing what we want and acting in accordance with our wishes and beliefs, then we find it easy to love him. But there are also the times that we find this difficult. When he is not being loveable, we may find ourselves feeling critical of him or even harbouring unpleasant negative feelings. We may even want him to suffer, because after all, he has made us suffer, hasn’t he?

So, how do we turn this less than satisfactory situation into true love and happiness? Well the first step is realising that a man cannot make you happy, no matter how much he wants to or you want him to. Whilst you will feel happiness with your partner at times, another person will never complete you. You see, happiness is a state of mind and comes from within.

You can see this by considering how you may react to the same situation depending on how you feel at the time. Imagine your man comes home from work and he has had a bad day. You ask him to take out the garbage and he completely ignores you. As he slumps in the chair in front of the TV you can see that he is feeling bad and you rush over to help soothe his feelings.

Now, the same thing happens on another day. Only this time you’ve had a bad day yourself. This time, you were hoping for some comfort from him. When he ignores you, you feel neglected and unloved. You let him know how you feel and an argument ensues. Communication breaks down and the rest of the evening is ruined.

So, now we have established that a man is not able to make us happy. Happiness comes from within and is about you making the choice to be happy despite your external circumstances. It is about taking responsibility for your own feelings and not expecting your man to conform to everything that you want. It is not about the perfect relationship but about focussing on the positives in the relationship rather than the negatives.

It is very hard to love someone else unless you love yourself first. This is because the way you love your man is a reflection of your own needs and beliefs around love and how it should or shouldn’t be. Unconditional acceptance of yourself as well as your partner is the only way to find unconditional love in your life. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you should put up with a partner who treats you badly.

So, yes you can find happiness in a relationship. But only if you are happy on your own first. If you are looking for love then you must start by loving yourself. Unless you can do this you will never be able to allow love in fully. You must take responsibility for your own happiness by examining your own beliefs and reactions and how they serve you. And you must accept your man and allow him to be the person he is. Only when all these things come together with a man who loves you and wants to make you happy will you be able to say that you have found true love.

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Source by Lucy O’Brien